There is something really big that often gets forgotten when talking about our bodies.
When discovering how to truly and fully honor my body and myself, there was an abundance of conversations, articles and journals discussing ways to make me honorable. Drastically neglected, however, was the concept that it is not a matter of changing my body or me in order to find home, it was a matter of finding home now - regardless. For years, I worked backwards.
When you seek external ways to find home, even though you may be working so hard to find it, you are actually taking yourself further and further away.
In seeking externally, you are sending your deepest self (imagine an ice-berg, most of which you cannot see, but stuff goes on down there!) a message that you are not yet allowed to experience and deeply feel self-worth.
For most women, this happens through extreme or even subtle self-objectification, or more simply, by evaluating and measuring oneself based on physical appearance. The American Psychological Association has actually declared self-objectification in women as an epidemic. This comes attached to: disordered eating, poor body image, fixation on food, depression, and even low-cognitive function.
This very literal reality keeps you from fully living your life (or: seeing your potential and worth, that relationship, forgiveness, financial success, your power).
Your body - it is your container. Most things you do, think and feel move through your container and into expression. When shaming, discrediting or objectifying your container, you are literally keeping yourself from stepping into a place of real, deep, personal freedom.
You know that moment when you get into bed at night after a long ass day and it feels out-of-this-world good? How about when you receive a genuinely warm embrace from a friend, family member or significant other? Or, for anyone who has practiced yoga, that moment when you roll onto your side after a deep savasana and you feel what it is like to be an infant again – even for just a second.
Close your eyes, take a deep breath in and remind yourself of that feeling. Do it!
That feeling – that is also what if feels like to be home in your body.
To access the feeling when it comes to finding home in your body, it requires you to begin retraining the pathways in your brain to experience home now. Much like lifting weights and training muscles, you have to retrain your mind to find home now, regardless of what you did or didn’t do, what you ate or didn’t eat.
To start: Stick a post-in note on your mirror, in your car, or anywhere you often find yourself that reads, “I am already home.” Repeat it. Repeat it again.
When you find home in your body:
the inner-dialogue quiets.
you discover what you are truly capable of.
you experience unrestrained freedom.
When YOU are home - you are always home!