Just the other day I was hanging with my one-year old nephew and he was having a bit of a sad moment. The tears were flowing and it was quite difficult to pull him out of it, so I took him outside for some new perspective.
We stood there gazing up at the trees and enjoying the change of scenery. For a moment – some peace. But soon enough, the little guy remembered he wanted something, and a change of scenery was not going to do the trick.
Food and body image peace-seekers - you know this drill. You are feeling out of control with food and your body, but then you: move, go on a trip, start a new exercise routine, visit a friend, meet a man, discover a new diet, change your job – and suddenly, all seems better. You don’t feel as crazy around food, and so, you start to feel better in your body.
For a moment, the change in life offers fresh air and new perspective. You can do anything. The exercise program will do it. The new job feels like a game-changer.
Change ain't all that:
Then you get comfortable and settled into the "life-changing" experience. And with that, the novelty of change fades, the peace slips through your hands and the drill you so deeply know is back on. Much like my nephew, location (or diets, jobs, boyfriends) is not the solution that will create the change you are so deeply wanting. You know the saying two halves don’t make a whole? Well…
you + [insert: your trip, job, boyfriend, or diet] do not equal one whole/better you.
The BIG change (the one actually does works):
The change that creates the shift you have been looking for happens in a much different way. The big change is to stop looking for anything (ANYTHING!) outside yourself to support you in finding peace with food and your body.
By constantly seeking alternative and inventive ways to control food and your body, you are actually feeding the cycle that keeps you stuck where you are.
What if you began to surrender instead of seek? I know - this sounds crazy.
But, the moment you choose to honor yourself NOW –
regardless of what you should or shouldn’t look like,
what you should or shouldn’t do
– is the moment when real peace begins to arrive, and real sustainable change unfolds and becomes possible.
Walking out to gaze at the trees may be soothing for a moment, but it does not solve the real need for something to deeply transform.
If you'll let it, peace can start now.